What Being a Parent Has Taught Me

I realize that I'm been a parent for a minute 9 months, but I feel like Jillian has taught me many things. She has changed me from the inside out and given my heart more of a reason to beat.

1. There will be times when your child knows best.
As someone with control issues, I find it really hard to let Jillian take the lead. "She doesn't know what she's doing yet!" "If I don't intervene, she'll starve/hurt herself/be frustrated."
I can come up with many excuses to force my way on her. Certain times I do know best. However, there are situations where I have to let her tell me what she wants. I can't shove food down her throat, no matter how much I worry she's not eating enough. I can't make her sleep, no matter how tired she is. I won't relinquish all of my control, but it certainly makes our day much happier in the end.

2. There are things you will have to figure out on your own.
Countless books and websites have told me how to make sure my baby is warm in the winter. How many taught me how to keep her cool in the 100+ degree weather this summer? None. Not a single one. I'm sure part of it is it comes across as common sense that you should keep your child cool with fans, or light clothing right? Well, that can be an argument for keeping your baby warm too. So I did some improvising. And you know what? It worked out. I'm not saying it worked out all the time and every time, but we got by. That includes having our two major stretches of little to no air conditioning in our place of residence. Improvising can be scary, but it's important to do what is best for you and your baby.

3. Crying and laughing go hand in hand.
There are times where Jillian will do something that can make me mad/scared and crack me up and the same time. This is also a lesson in not taking myself so seriously and let things go. For example, just this morning I decided to let Jillian feed herself breakfast. All the books told me she needs to learn and I have to give her a chance. I gave her the spoon and held the bowl down. After about 15 minutes of nothing, I gave her a quick spoonful myself. She seemed hungry so I figured that gave her motivation. I let go of the bowl and sat back. Within 30 seconds, Jillian threw her spoon on the floor, grabbed the bowl, and watched the food drip down into her lap. I thought she'd move it soon, but I was wrong. Every last bit of that food covered her like this

{I think the face says it all}

A part of me was so mad that she wasted that food, and I just wanted to cry. Money is tight right now, and baby food is not cheap. However, watching her just let it drip down into her diaper was one of the funniest things I've seen in awhile. Yes it was a little annoying that I had to bathe her, then put her down for a nap, then clean the floor, and finally put her highchair in the shower just to have a fighting chance of getting it clean. But the video and photos I took were priceless :)

4. I can do this.
Some days, I don't know how I get through the day. I feel inadequate as a mother, as a wife, and some times even as a human being. If she has a bad day too, it takes everything in me to not break down. The silver lining is that I almost always have an amazing with Jillian the next day. It's as if God knows I need a day to remind myself of why bad days are worth it. Even on the days that are just an ordinary, I catch myself peeking in on her while she naps and just smiling. I will make mistakes. I will have days where I pray my sanity will hold out until Phil gets home for reinforcement. Lucky for me, between my support systems and Jillian herself, I know I can do this! I am going to be the best mom that I can humanly be. That's all I can do, but it will be enough.

Spoonful of Sugar

I had quite a day today. It started with our air conditioner getting checked out. What luck that our air conditioner goes kaput the last two days it will be in the mid 90's for a high this year :-/ I ended up getting some bad news about it. It is fixable, but in order to fix it, it would require bringing the unit up to code. That is apparently not covered by our home warranty and would cost us between $1200 and $1900 dollars out of pocket. Yeah. So we're making phone calls, and getting second opinions while trying to stay cool. The nice thing about have a water heater that doesn't heat water well? We have plenty of cold water when our house is 85 degrees :) {Silver lining anyone?}

After all that fun, Jillian and I got to see my friend Jessica today! She had a rough day at school and needed some cheering up as well. We went to Target, the mall, and lunch. Overall, we had an awesome time and forgot our crappy days for a few hours. I got Jillian's Halloween costume mostly purchased, (I'll expand on that another time), and a sheet set for our bed. I don't remember if I mentioned this or not, but I ripped ours almost a week ago :( It is made out of jersey fabric so it looks like a V-neck t-shirt! Once I wash it tomorrow, I'll put up a picture.

Before dinner, Phil and I went and signed up for the 24 hour gym around the corner from our house. I mean, I could walk across a field to get there, so now I don't have any excuses ;) We got our keys and set up appointments with the trainer. You get 1 free training session so that you can get set on the track you need to be successful. I'm excited to get started!

I feel like, if I had a smart phone, (let's be serious; if I had a phone that took pictures), I would have more photos to share. Maybe Santa will bring me one this year ;) Until then, I just have to stick with being wordy.

I hope y'all had a good day!

Special Day and Random Thoughts

Today is a special for our little family. Jillian has been in the world for 40 weeks and 2 days as of today, September 19th. That's how long I was pregnant with her :)

To think she's gone from this:

to this:

in 40 weeks and 2 days, is just amazing. I was just telling someone the other day that she's almost a completely different baby from just a month ago. She's army crawling, babbling, and just changing constantly!
Of course now that she is crawling so much, she is getting into more trouble. For example, I was trying to pick up quickly yesterday and found this:

 {Finger painting with food... on the carpet.}

{The I-didn't-do-it face. Good thing she's cute ;)}

After I cried a little on the inside laughed, I cleaned her and the carpet as best I could. However, we now have brought back the Pack n Play to container her. She's just a little too fast for me to not have a safe place for her to play.

{Welcome back old friend}

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Jillian had her 9 month well check up yesterday and did well! She even smiled at the doctor when he walked in. Of course, she cried when he checked her ears, and then again when she got her flu shot. We then had a fun, but short visit from my bestie Annette! We went to lunch and hung out at the house. Jillian didn't seem to be in any discomfort from her shot and was in a good mood all day. I'm so glad we got a chance to see Annette!

*****

I almost forgot to do my bible study questions for this morning. Like, I remembered last night at 10:30 and the meeting was at 9:15 this morning. Whoops! Luckily, it wasn't too hard and it was only two chapters of reading. I've been using The Message translation just because I feel like it is more straightforward. I do like to read another translation just to compare.

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With season tickets for TU football, I have been behind on everything. I've been doing the entire week's worth of laundry on Thursday. All. day. long. It's the only time I can do it. We finally have the house picked up again, but that was a last minute dash for company yesterday. However, we will available to stay home a few weekends in a row. That will be nice :)

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Have you tried Blue Moon Harvest Pumpkin Ale? I bought some when I went grocery shopping Monday and took a sip of Phil's last night. Yummy! I know not many girls are beer drinkers, but if you are, give it a shot! {But not a literal shot. It's better in a regular glass.} 

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Even though it's still in the upper 80's and lower 90's, the morning temperature has been showing signs of fall. The official first day is Saturday, but it won't be cool around her for at least another month or so. Either way, I'm so excited!! I have decorating plans, but we'll see how it goes ;)

Happy Wednesday y'all!

Jillian: {Nine Months}

Jillian –

You are nine months old today! It’s crazy to think that you’ll be a one year old in just 90 days. According to our at-home measurements, you are 18 lbs, 3 oz and 27 1/2 inches long. I will update this after your 9 month well-check up next week. Updated: You are 17 lbs, 14 oz and 27 inches long.

You are still in some 6 Month (though dresses are getting to be too short), 6-9 Month, and 9 Month clothes. There is a 3-6 Month dress that is long enough to still fit you. We’ll wear it until it’s too small. You wear size 3 diapers.

Eating is overall going well! You have about four 5-6 oz bottles a day, and you have 3 solid food meals. Green beans are still your favorite food. Beef seems to be your least favorite. You don’t seem to like teething feeder whenever we’ve tried giving you non-pureed food. Finger foods don’t seem to interest you too much either. You can pick up puffs, but have trouble getting them in your mouth 25% of the time. You seem to favor your left hand when feeding yourself either with finger foods or with your spoon. We may have a lefty on our hands!

You are still taking Zantac twice a day for your reflux. At your well-check up, we’ll ask if it’s time to start weaning you off of it.

It seems like you have teething pain from time to time, but still no new teeth.

You roll around everywhere and you started army crawling 4 days ago! However, if the object you want is too far, you sometimes give up and just cry until we pick you up. I hate to interfere, but you get a little hysterical if I just leave you alone. You also recently pulled yourself up to standing once! You starting waving recently, but will not do it on command yet. Although your hands can't just yet, you can clap with you feet. In fact, you try to do everything with your feet that you can with your hands. You silly monkey baby ;)

We recently stopped swaddling you at naptime and it kind of killed your good naps. You are catnapping again without the swaddle. You are also starting to fall asleep on your tummy at nap time only. It makes me nervous, but I have to trust that you will move if you need to now that you’re older. I do check on you often, just to be sure :) You’ve been waking up once at night ever since we got home from Minnesota. Sometimes it’s around midnight, and other times it is around 4 a.m. We can usually get you back to sleep with a pacifier, but we’d rather you sleep through the night again.

You caught another cold this month. It only lasted a few days, but then mommy caught it from you. After a week of stuffy/runny noses, you were back to normal. You have not had a single ear infection yet! {Knocks on wood}

We went up to Minnesota to visit your Jemma and G-Chaz this month! We did all kinds of fun things. We went to the zoo, you played in a pool for the first time, and we got to hang out with two really cool people :) You’re still a good traveler, but not for 12 hours at a time. {Trust me baby girl, nobody is a good traveler for that long!} During the trip back home, you really started to babble! You say “mama”, “ba ba ba” (for bang bang bang when hitting toys together), and “dada”. We’ve heard other things, but it is usually when your fingers are in your mouth. It’s so fun to hear your sweet voice!

It’s going to be a busy fall with you daddy and I having season tickets to TU football. That just means you’ll get to see your Grandma Darla and Papa Jim much more often than before!

Jillian, we love you so very much. You are amazing and it is an honor to be your parents :)

 {Lalalalala... Ooo something on the ceiling!}

 {Who took my pacifier?!}

 {What's that in your hand mama?}

 {My pacifier? Don't mind if I do! *chomp*}

{Maybe if I sit real still, she'll stop and let me play}

And some comparisons :)

Intense Weekend

I don't want to seem like I'm making light of today by not mentioning the 11th anniversary of 9/11. Honestly, it did change many things in my life. I did post something last year and it was pretty hard to write. I don't want to come off as insincere since I was not directly affected by the events that unfolded. However, with Jillian's arrival, I would rather focus on hope, and the future. I will never forget, and my thoughts and prayers will be on those.

Fun note: This is my 400th post! Wow, who knew I'd talk so much about absolutely nothing ;)

Our weekend was quite eventful. It started with a rather scary trip up the turnpike. We left about 2:15 because Phil got off work early. After several scary moments involving semi-trucks and crazy drivers, we finally got into Tulsa city limits. As we are crossing a long bridge, I notice that we couldn't really see downtown because of what looked like a large fire. After another 2 miles, we realized that the cold front moving through was creating a second dust bowl. There are several construction areas on top of the dirt being dry from our drought. The wind really picked up and we got to Phil's parents' house just in time. I couldn't imagine trying to drive up the turnpike in that mess :-/  Later that evening, Phil and I went to see Hope Springs with some friends. It was actually really funny, but there were a few awkward moments for anyone under 50 years of age.

Saturday, we all went to the TU v. Tulane game. I tried to make sure Jillian was covered since it was really sunny outside. Well, we were there when the Tulane player, Devon Walker, was injured. It was one of the most intense moments of my life. As soon as I saw the TU chaplain, (who I know well from years before), my stomach instantly knotted. I'm so glad they stabilized him and he is getting the medical attention he deserves. We had plans to take photos for the first home game, (and Jillian's first football game), but I didn't feel much like it after that. Surprisingly, Jillian did really well at the stadium and may have even lasted the whole game. I was pretty shaken up after that, but we had to head home that night. We had a nice dinner with Phil's folks and had a relatively quiet trip down the turnpike.

Once we got home, I realized I was pretty badly sunburned. So sunburned in fact, that Phil took off work yesterday to help take care of me and Jillian. Luckily Jillian did not have any sunburn and Phil just had some on his knees and left side of his face. I really got the bulk of the burn. I'm feeling much better today, but it is still just as red as the picture below.

Sunday, Phil and I tried something with Jillian. We introduced her to our keyboard! She seemed to really like it :)

{Daddy had to prop two pillows in his lap for her to reach the keys. Look at that concentration though!}

{Looking into our future with her as a teen}

{HAHA I happen to catch her blinking, but it looks like she's giving Phil the evil eye.} 

{My little Stevie Wonder/Ray Charles :)} 

{<3}

{I can just picture this is a senior slideshow, can't you?}

I hope y'all had a better, and less eventful, weekend. And please, let's not even begin to discuss Arkansas or Oklahoma State's games on Saturday. I've suffered enough.

Friday Photos 9/7

I have a collection of cute photos of a certain little lady :) Plus, I have a few chores to get done today as quickly as I can. Hope y'all have a great weekend!

{Dressed up for game day! Got our Razorback hairbow and TU colored tutu made by Aunt Jessica!}

{I love this picture! I think she looks like a ballerina :)} 

{What a stylin' lady ;)}

{Her favorite thing to do is take off my sunglasses, so I put them on her} 

{Most of my playing photo outtakes includes at least one of these shots HAHA} 

{Her new way to nap in her crib} 

{It makes me a little nervous, but at least she's sleeping} 

{This series of photos is from this morning. I put a Kleenex on her head and she didn't notice right away} 

{Wait a minute...} 

{Attempting to pull it off} 

{Finally free!}

Tuesday Catch-Up

We had a very relaxing/not exciting Labor Day weekend around here. It mostly consisted of all three of us getting over the cold/allergies we had all last week. I was the last to get sick and it was not fun at all :( Luckily, we're all on the mend and just barely sniffling ;) We ran a few errands, but nothing to really write home about.

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Phil and I have a movie/tv show trade-off system. If we want the other to see a movie or show we like, we negotiate a movie or show the other likes. At the beginning of the summer, Phil went through Grey's Anatomy on Netflix with me! Even though he did enjoy it, (the medical side of it anyways), I still offered to watch his choice: Star Trek: The Next Generation. We officially started it on Wednesday of last week and we're almost halfway through the first season. Being a Star Wars fan, I wasn't entirely sure how much I'd enjoy it. I'm not hooked just yet, but there is still potential.

*****

Jillian and I went to a special "Bring Your Baby" showing of The Odd Life of Timothy Green. First of all, it was AWESOME to take Jillian with me. There weren't many people at the theater, but that's fine with me. I was able to park her stroller in sight, feed her, and she did really well for the 2 hours we were there. She even took a 20 minute nap :) I guarantee that I would have bawled my eyes out if I had watched it alone. I mean, the I'm-a-sap-plus-a-new-mommy kind of crying. It was a good movie, and I don't feel like I really missed any of it. I sure hope they keep doing this because it was nice to get out while hanging out with Jilly :)

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I'm finally back on my Metformin full time. I'm stocked with Pepto tablets, and Tums. Even watching what I eat doesn't keep the nausea and indigestion that comes with getting used to the medicine again. I stopped while I was able to breastfeed Jillian. Once I lost my supply, I tried getting back on, but kept forgetting to take it. {Hey, I was a new mom with a fried brain. I barely remembered to brush my hair before leaving the apartment!} Then I was uninsured from my birthday until Phil's new job's insurance kicked in August 1st. I will say that it's nice to have good insurance again!

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I'm almost done with the guest room before it's complete! Well, the short list of changes anyway. I can't wait to finish and show the rest of it to y'all.

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While I am sorry that TU lost, the fact the Arkansas and OSU won, (and won big), I was still pretty happy at the end of the night. Wooo Pig Sooie! Go Pokes!

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With Jillian turning 9 months in about a week, (say what?!), I've got the majority of her birthday party planned out. This is partially due to my excitement, and the fact that I have to figure out something easy for people since it's during the holiday season. I figured I'd keep it simple and go from there. I'm satisfied with what I have so far. Hopefully I can pull it off when the time comes :)

I hope y'all have a great day after the 3-day weekend!