Saturday, December 31, 2011

See Ya 2011! Let's Go 2012



A few things I didn't hit in the video:
  • Phil and I moved to a new apartment in town
  • We had a few smallish earthquakes in Oklahoma
  • I was blessed to have 3 baby showers, and 1 by mail - I'm a spoiled woman :)
  • I barely survived the huge heatwave since I was very much pregnant
  • I walked 4 out of a 5K in September in celebration of my MIL's 5th year of breast cancer remission and it was the weekend before her 55th birthday!
  • Thanksgiving was held at our apartment and it went well despite the small space
  • I finally finished the baby quilt I started in 2009
  • We met my folks in KC for a Royals game at the end of my 1st trimester
  • I got an awesome camera for my birthday! I'm still learning how to use it
  • We went to several concerts including Lady Gaga, Rascal Flatts, and Sugarland
  • We bought season tickets for TU football and Phil got to most of them while I only made it to about 4 games
  • I spent most of my 3rd trimester cleaning obsessively. It's funny how I want to keep cleaning, but I don't have the time or energy now that Jill is actually here
  • Phil and I watched the entire series Bones on Netflix over the course of 2 months this summer
  • Jill has blessed us beyond measure - even when we're deliriously tired, we are thankful
  • Even though 2011 was a great year for us, we are looking forward to a new year full of new beginnings
HAHA Apparently I forgot more than I thought. Clearly Jill is very distracting in a you're-so-cute kinda way!

Now here are a few pictures for the grandparents to enjoy :)

I went to get Jill ready for bed and I found her not only out of her swaddle, but in this position!
Silly Jilly :)

Love this face!

We went for a walk and her only sun-shielding hat is a little big for her HAHA 

 Proud Daddy walking his girl :)

Her pacifier fell out, but it didn't even phase her!

I don't really make resolutions, but I do make goals. I may do another word of the year like I did this year. I haven't entirely decided yet. I do know that I'm officially 4 pounds above my pre-pregnancy weight already! I will definitely be starting a weight loss program in the next month or so. Once I decide my goals and/or word of the year, I will let y'all know!

I hope you all have a wonderful and safe New Year's!

Lots of love,

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Looking Up

Thank you all so much for the hugs and kind wishes :) The past 2 days have been much easier and it helps that I'm getting a little more sleep as I get used to all the sounds Jill makes. I used to think I needed to check on her for every sound. Now I know what to listen for. Last night was a little rough just because Petey was whining at our door when we finally got Jill settled for the night. Luckily, everything worked out.

Today we had her 2 week appointment with Dr. V. Overall, she is doing well :) She is now 7 lbs 4 oz, 20 3/4" long and everything we've been worried about is all normal. She is on a different formula to help with spit ups since she will spit up despite keeping her elevated for 20 minutes after feeding. In fact, sometimes she'd spit up an hour afterwards and would wake up from a sound sleep to spit up. The worst was when it came out of her nose at 2 am this morning. I was kinda scary for me and Jill definitely did not like it either! Phil was able to calm her down and get her back to sleep. We have had 3 feedings so far today with the new stuff and so far... not a single drop of spit up :)

We do tummy time every other day for now just because I'm not 100% sure when I need to start it. Plus, I don't really know what else to do with her when she's wide awake. Any advice from mommies?

Here is a short, (3 minutes), video I took this afternoon. I had Jill in her rocker and tried to get her many faces. Please excuse the mommy voice :)



Wednesday, December 28, 2011

They Weren't Kidding

First and foremost, I want it known that I do not have it all together. If it ever appears that way here, I'm just trying to be positive and not come across as fake.

Second, when people warn you about post-partum stuff? Listen. I didn't feel overly emotional the first week or so once Jill arrived, but yesterday was a completely different story. A few times, Jill screamed. It was never for a long time, but it was not pleasant. Then she sneezed blood out of one of her nostrils. Then she'd wake up almost every 30 minutes for most of the night.

You know what I did yesterday? Full out bawled my eyes out. As soon as Phil started to talk to me to calm me down, Jill started to cry again. I ended up calling my mom in tears. She listened well and helped me calm down. I was still sad and upset, but I didn't feel hopeless anymore. I did still cry a little yesterday. Just imagine me in pj pants, an oversized shirt, dirty/messy hair in a ponytail and dishing up dinner on a paper plate while crying black tears because my mascara is not waterproof.

Some days I just feel like I can't do this. Like I don't have the skills or patience or ability to care for a baby. I've read several books, (one specifically about colic-y babies), but I don't think I was prepared. I think I was read for the 3-4 month old baby range. Instead, I have this precious newborn who is much more vulnerable and needy than I was expecting.

Deep down, I know I can do it and that every new mom feels like this. Yesterday just exploded thanks to my hormones. My body is still healing. We've had house guests off and on for the past 2 weeks. We've experienced a major holiday. My husband needs to get back to work someday so we can pay bills. I just felt hopeless with everything that happened.

So when they warn you about post-partum depression? Listen. It can happen at any moment and may only last a day. However, it is pretty intense.

If you could just send a hug to me either through your mind or electronically, I would appreciate it. I'm a firm believer that a good hug can make a world of difference :)

Oh and just so you know, we called the on-call nurse who said the bloody sneezes was just irritated membranes since she was not actively bleeding nor had a temperature. She didn't even seem bothered by it, but it was a little scary for us.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Hiccups and Possible Colic

See this sweet face?

She gets the hiccups... a lot! Just about every other feeding, my poor baby girl is hiccuping for what seems like forever! Our pediatrician gave us a book at her 5 day appointment and it says that, as long as it doesn't bother her, it's not cause for concern. Jill definitely doesn't seem bothered in the slightest by them. I just feel so bad for her!

I'm starting to feel like I'm getting a handle on things. I still get emotional about stuff, but I'm sure part of it is my extra hormones. It seems like I'm slowly acting "normal" for me ;) It does frustrate me that Phil seems to be better at getting Jill to sleep than I am. I know it's nothing personal, but I wish I could do it too.

I do have a few questions for our pediatrician when we go on Thursday. Luckily the practice Dr. V is a part of has triage nurses on call who's sole purpose is to answer non-emergency questions. I can't tell you how thankful I am to have that available to us! Also, now that someone is officially 2 weeks old, she's had a few moments today where I'm wondering if she'll be slightly colic-y. Hopefully that's not the case, but we're prepared in case she is. Plus, we'll still love her just as much :)

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas 2011

I hope y'all had a Merry Christmas, Happy Holiday Season and a day without stress :)

Here's a quick glimpse of our celebration...

What does Santa bring to a 13 day old baby? Diapers, a new bib, some pacifiers, formula, and some teethers :)

Our tree 

Jill in a family heirloom "Christmas Sack"! 

Jill's OOTD 

Had to get a shot of the cute tush ;) 

 The aftermath in our living room

Someone is tuckered out after her first Christmas celebration

We were lucky enough to spend the day with my in-laws AND Skype with my parents, (and my brother came over to do it with us), to open our gifts together! It wasn't the exact same, but it was so nice to see my parents as well as hear their voices :) Now we're watching Forrest Gump and drinking egg nog. All in all, Jill's first Christmas was a success and I feel blessed.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Hypochondria

If I'm honest with myself, I know that I'm not 100% ok right now. I was telling Phil just last night that I can tell something is wrong. It's not really post-partum depression like I would assume. I take care of Jill and give her attention when we're alone. However, as soon as someone else is around, (whether it's Phil or a friend/family member), I let them take over. If they want to feed and burp her, I let them. If they want to hold her for 2 hours, I let them. It makes me feel a little bad, but it doesn't hinder how I take care of her when I'm the only one around.

Then yesterday happened.

I have admitted before that I am a hypochondriac. It's not an easy thing to live with and it's really not that severe. I can usually still function and not have it ruin experiences for me. I worry about things, but they usually work out anyways. Now I'm seeing how it affects my view of Jill.

Yesterday morning, I woke up and went to use the restroom. When I came back into our room, I checked on Jill in her bassinet as I always do. Her forehead looked blue, but the rest of her body was pink. I stared at her for a little bit and noticed she was breathing. However, seeing her forehead like that really worried me. Knowing she was breathing and not in critical condition, I called my mom. She suggested I just elevate her head so that the capillaries could circulate blood in her forehead again. I did just that and she pinked right up. It was just really scary for me seeing her like that! My fear of her getting too hot made me worried that I made her too cold. Plus, it's really hard to regulate the temperature in our apartment accurately.

Then last night, I looked in her bassinet again to check on her and noticed some spit up. I lifted her up and my hand slipped a little bit. She was jostled a little bit, but she barely reacted because she was so deep in sleep. Before I came to that realization, I worried she was unconscious due to her not reacting. I laid her on the bed and tapped on her feet, said her name out loud and after what felt like forever, (but in reality only about 20 seconds), she moved again. At that moment, Phil walked in and asked how things were going. I just lost it. I told him what happened and I couldn't stop crying. I was just so scared!

I know a little spit up is ok, especially if it doesn't bother baby. In fact, two books we have confirmed this. However, I watched her spit up a little bit ago when I was trying to get her to sleep in her pack n play. I quickly picked her up and wiped her off. I started to hold and rock her before I lost it again. I just hate feeling so helpless.

I have a perfectly healthy baby who is gaining weight. She's rarely fussy and she sleeps well for a 10 day old. Aside from being a hypochondriac, I have no other explanation for my constant fears. I am so fearful of her dying of SIDS or something happening to her.

The difference between my hypochondria with myself and with my daughter? I know that my fears for her are unfounded. I'm aware that I'm overreacting like whoa. How does any new mother survive the first few weeks? How does a new mother with hypochondria survive? Why can't I just calm down and enjoy my precious baby girl?

Someday I hope to be normal. Whether it be the loss of these extra hormones or getting help about my constant fears. Either way, I need to push through so I can care for Jill in the best way that I can.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Quick Update

We have now been home for 1 full week. Phil and I are starting to get into a pretty good routine and feeling like we have a handle on this parenting thing. Well, as much of a handle as anyone can have ;)

I can't tell you how happy I am that we prepared for Christmas so early this year. With less than 4 days left, I couldn't imagine trying to shop right now. Our apartment is really close to a mall and traffic has been nuts the few times I've ventured out. Poor Phil still has to get my gifts, but I know he'll find a way. Also, before she left to go home, my mom made buckeyes and fudge for me! I was hoping to make some cookies as well, but we ran out of time. I may make them later or just wait and make some for Valentine's Day. We shall see. I have caught myself day-dreaming about Christmas next year. Taking Jill to see some Christmas lights. Meeting Santa for the first time. Letting her unwrap her own gifts. I just know time will speed up soon and Christmas 2012 will be here before I know it. My only hope is that I treasure every moment I can before Jill becomes a teenager! HAHA

Jill has been a great sleeper lately and I am so thankful for that! I have moments where I'm ready for a nap, but I don't feel sleep deprived. It could also be a result of all those years in college when I was too busy for my own good. I know things can change quickly so I'm enjoying the fact that she's a good sleeper now :)

I think once I'm able to drive again I'll have more to talk about. For now, it's mostly mommy stuff that seems a little repetitive. I will say that I'm feeling really good overall physically! I don't take my pain medication overnight and I try to go more than 5 hours before taking it during the day. One reason for this is so I won't get hooked on it, (though I highly doubt that would happen anyways). The other is because I don't get a refill so once I take them all, it's gone for good. I'm sure just regular Tylenol will suffice anyways. Mostly my back is the sorest part of my body right now. I still have to take an extra 5 minutes to pee since I still have stitches down there. Luckily it's not so bad and I'm not passing many clots anymore either. I'm hoping these are all good signs :) My 6 week appointment is scheduled for late January so I'll be interested to see what Dr. V has to say then.

Weight loss plans are starting to form right now. I don't want to start too fast and hurt myself/burn myself out before I get going. Thankfully Phil is going to be helping me so we should be good. I think I'll start with some light walking and just go from there.

Hope y'all are having a great Wednesday!

Monday, December 19, 2011

1 Week

Today my baby turns 1 week old. I would say this week has flown by, but that would be lying. Ever since I got home from the hospital, I've tried to soak up every second I can with Jill. This has caused the days to seem longer than normal. I'm sure the short spurts of sleeping at night may help a little ;) Plus, she has done a few things, such as attempting to lift her head and suck her thumb, that makes her seem like she's older than just 7 days! I'm not sure when I'm supposed to start activities like tummy time. Any advice from other mamas would be welcomed :)

Just for fun, here is a belly picture of me 1 week post-partum!

{I tried to put her near my belly, but she was getting fussy}

And for more fun, here's what 1 week of motherhood for me looks like.
{I want to keep things real here. Yes, those are leaks on my shirt, (and yes, I woke up wondering why I was cold). Yes, my hair has looked like this for a few days. And yes, I still have a smile on my face!}

We did have to take Jill to another doctor's appointment to settle some insurance referral stuff. She had a slightly elevated temperature, but we think it's because she was bundled up so much. She had on a fleece sleeper, a knitted hat, and was being carried in our Moby wrap. The first time the forehead scanner said 100.8, then 99.7, then 99.2. She seems really healthy otherwise so the doctor didn't seem too concerned. Now we are going to check her temperature everyday just to be on the safe side. I think I'm going to start "scheduling" some skin-to-skin time to help her regulate her body temperature. Even if her chest and back feel warm, her hands and feet stay cold. I also don't mind the excuse ;) She does have a little build up in her right eye, but the doctor confirmed that it's just clogged tear ducts. It will go away soon and it's fairly common. Overall, we have a healthy girl!

Funny story about the doctor's visit though. When we were walking to the scale, the nurse asked if she had a clean diaper. We both said "yes" and I started to lift her out of the Moby. As soon as her little tush was out, she let out a humongous fart. We both started laughing and I said "Well, I guess not anymore!" After she was weighed, Phil lifted her up and she farted two more times! We changed her diaper once we got to the room, but she pooped again right before the doctor came to exam her. What a little stinker ;)

Happy Monday y'all!

p.s. Melt my heart...

Sunday, December 18, 2011

How Things Change

A year ago today, (365 days, 525,600 minutes, etc.), I walked across a stage and finally received my Bachelor's degree. It took me 6 1/2 years, but I finally did it. I was going to be working full time and helping Phil focus on finishing his PhD.

I decided to start the next year off right. I vowed to be under 200 pounds by our anniversary in May. I was going to do a bible study just for me. I started to plan a trip with Phil for the summer. I had so many plans for the year. Then...






Now here I am, a mother. Jill turns one week old tomorrow and I just can't believe it. I'll stare at her when she sleeps in complete awe of her. How is she mine? I get to keep her? How can I love someone so much? All I know is, no matter how different my life is compared to what I thought it would be a year ago, I am so thankful :)

One thing I have learned that they don't warn you about? After your baby is out of you, you still do embarrassing things like fart out of nowhere and drool all over yourself without noticing. Nice right? Luckily, the baby is still worth it.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Random Update

Being a new mama on a new parent sleeping schedule, my mind does not work in a linear fashion. Enjoy my post of randomness!

  • It feels pretty weird not taking a picture today or giving an update on bebe. However, since we're so thrilled to have Jill among us, I don't mind at all :) I will post a 1 week post-partum photo on Monday for kicks.
  • We went to the pediatrician, Dr. V, to weigh Jill to see if she was gaining weight yet. I'm very happy to say that she is back up to 6 pounds and 2 ounces! Now that we've figured out that she's just super hungry, especially at night, it's made the midnight hours much easier. There are a few times where she gives us no warning before just becoming inconsolable, but we're getting better at hurrying up. I've gotten about 6 hours of sleep total the past two nights. It doesn't sound like much, but I'm pretty happy about it.
  • My milk has come in and I'm so happy that I'm able to breastfeed! After my surgery, I wasn't sure it would happen. However, I can't really breastfeed directly. Jill is great at latching on, but after a few minutes she clamps down and it really hurts mama. No matter how many times I have her latch again, she does the same thing. Since it has caused some cracking and bleeding, I am pumping milk, then feeding her with a bottle and a little formula mixed in (which is what Dr. V recommended to get her gaining weight). I don't get that skin-to-skin time with her, but I am still able to provide for her nutritional needs in a way that does hurt so much :) However, I do need a better pump so let me know if you have any suggestions!
  • My dad left to go home to Minnesota today. It was great to have him here and I'm looking forward to our visit up there for my birthday. My mama is still here for another few days and I am so thankful. She's been amazing and so very helpful. It will be a rude awakening when she leaves, but I know we can handle it. I am truly blessed to have my family who is very supportive of one another.
  • I will say that Phil has been amazing from day one. We have both had a few moments of panic and frustration, but overall he's the best husband to me and father to Jilly :) Watching them interact is sweet and I love that he is more than happy to change diapers all day, feed her bottles when she's hungry and just hold her when he misses her.
  • Not much fits her right now just because she's so tiny. I'm glad I ordered a last minute pack of 3 newborn onesies from Carter's just in case. I really thought she'd be near 7 1/2 pounds at birth and assumed she'd grow out of newborn sizes quickly. I guess that's why you don't assume things right? ;)
  • We got some frustrating news about Phil and his defense this week. I won't go into any major details as they are being worked out. I do want it known that we are more than ready for him to finally be done with this headache and get his PhD!
  • We're watching "The Wizard of Oz" while we're attempting to put Jill down for a few hours. I always forget how long parts are, but I never forget how much I enjoy watching it. I hope Jill likes this movie too so we can watch it together someday.

Hope you've had a great Saturday!

Friday, December 16, 2011

Jillian's Birth Story - Pictures Included

Miss Jillian Rose arrived on Monday, December 12th at 3:52 p.m. She weighed 6 pounds and 6 oz and measured 20" long. She came out after 23 minutes of pushing and is the light of our lives!

Sunday night, Phil and I went to the hospital to start the induction process. We checked in and I was given some Cervadil to soften my cervix. I was told it would be in for 2 hours, then they would let me rest until 7:30 a.m. the next morning before starting the Pitocin. My parents came for a little bit and were with Phil and I for part of the night. My IV was one of the worst parts of the whole labor and delivery ordeal. For one, my main vein blew as they put the needle in. Then they put the needle in the crook of my wrist which was uncomfortable and sore for the rest of my stay. Anyways, after 1 hour of the Cervadil being inserted, Jill's heart rate dropped from the 140s to the 60's. We didn't notice because the monitor's alarm was off, but the nurses at the main station came in and quickly cleared the room. They immediately removed the Cervadil and did a few different things to get her heart rate back. After about 20 minutes, they got her heart rate where it needed to be and she was doing just fine. I will admit that I was pretty nervous from then on because I was afraid she would get stressed out again. Plus, to have the room cleared before knowing what's wrong... it's pretty scary. I am very thankful for the nursing staff because they really explained everything well afterwards and kept me in the loop from then on. They were also so kind throughout the whole process that I always felt comfortable. Once the nurse called my doctor, Dr. V, about what happened to Jill, she decided to start the Pitocin at 5:30 a.m. instead of 7:30. It was hard to sleep that night, (mostly because I was afraid Jill's heart rate would drop and I'd have to do an emergency C-section at 2 a.m.), but I managed to get 4 straight hours of sleep.

Monday was pretty much a blur from the time I woke up. We started the Pitocin and I was only dilated to a 1. After a few hours, Dr. V came by to check me out herself. Because the Cervadil really irritated my uterus, the check was incredibly painful. Dr. V immediately ordered an epidural for me before letting us know that I was already dilated to a 3 and about 75% effaced. Even though I wanted to wait a bit, I am so glad I got the epidural when I did. All the checks from then on were much more tolerable! The anesthesiologist was wonderful and kind to me. It did feel like a bee sting and the pressure in the beginning of the process was uncomfortable. However, it was tolerable for me, (and I have a low pain tolerance), and did not last long. Once he was all done, I felt great. I would feel pressure on my belly, similar to my BH where I felt like something heavy was on my belly, but no pain or cramping. The next checks had me at 5 cm and 80% effaced, then 8 1/2 and 90% effaced, then a 9 1/2. When I heard the 9 1/2, I knew this was it. I have a tendency to shake when I'm nervous about something so I started really shaking while everyone started to get ready. Phil was such a big help by holding my hand to let me know it would be all ok :) I also had to have an oxygen mask on for a little while because Jill wasn't getting as much oxygen the further down my pelvis she went. If for some reason you have to have this too? Don't worry. My L&D nurse said it happens to about 50% of her patients and always looks scarier than it really is.

Before I knew it, the room was cleared of everyone but the grandmas and Phil. I could feel pressure on my pelvic floor, but not really any pain. It was more uncomfortable, like when you're about to take a big poop. I started pushing a few times. I tried my best not to, but my face would get really red and I ended up breaking several blood vessels in my face. It didn't hurt, but it looked like I had a million new freckles on my face. Dr. V had me try a few different positions to push in before we settled on the one where I held on to some handle bars at the end of the bed. The only issue with that is, because my arms are so short, I would end up hanging off the edge of the bed by the end of the pushing cycle that I would have to scoot back after I was done! I know that they were having trouble picking up Jill's heartbeat during pushing, but I don't recall Dr. V mentioning that she may need to get the forceps or vacuum to get Jill out. All I remember is being told to let them know when I felt pressure and wanted to push. Since I was feeling constant pressure, I wanted to push. It didn't feel like I was making progress, but Dr. V was very impressed with my pushing apparently. I did need the oxygen mask again for pushing because I was having a hard time getting good breaths in between pushes. That really dried out my mouth, but it also helped tremendously. Now the next thing I know, I see the top of Jill's head on my chest and as I reached for her, I thought she was slipping. I tried to grab her before realizing Dr. V was moving her. I was waiting for Phil to cut the cord, because that was our plan. However, the next thing I hear Dr. V say is "no pulse". I started to really freak out as the grandmas and Phil start to go to the other end of the room. Turns out, Dr. V said "no bulb." What happened is, the syringe bulb to suction Jill fell on the floor so Dr. V had the scrub nurse cut the cord so the nursery nurse could suction for her. So Phil didn't cut the cord, but it was ok. I heard Jillian cry and knew she was ok. Then I hear Dr. V telling the scrub nurse about my injuries. I apparently had several lacerations that usually only occur if the doctor uses forceps for delivery. Long story short, my pelvis is so small that, had Jill been any larger, they would have had to perform a C-section to get her out. I did not get an episiotomy simply because I didn't give Dr. V enough time to do it. I overheard the nursery nurse call out her weight of 6 lbs, 6 oz and just thought that was so super tiny! By the time I was all cleaned up, the grandparents had posted the news to Facebook and mama was ready to see her baby girl.

When people tell you it's worth it, they absolutely mean it. I still have incredibly swollen legs, I'm horribly sleep deprived, and it hurts to sit/stand/laugh/pee. Every time I look in Jillian's eyes and see her start to smirk? Melts my heart instantly. It may be cliche, but I have so much more love in my heart that I feel like it could burst at any second! And seeing Phil with her? I am blessed beyond belief :)

And now for what I'm sure you really wanted... pictures!
 Just minutes old!
 Getting some much needed skin-to-skin bonding time with mama :)
 Papa Jim - Phil's dad holding his granddaughter
 My brother meeting his niece
 Safe in daddy's arms
 First family photo! <3
 Dressed up and ready to head home/back to reality

A few items have really been helping me get through the past 36 hours of being home. Aside from having an amazing husband, a wonderful parents who are staying with us a few days to help out, I couldn't have gotten by without*...
 This pump. Not knowing how my breast reduction surgery in 2007 would affect my ability to breastfeed, I have to pump a few times a day in hopes to establish a milk supply. Since we didn't want to invest heavily into a pump before knowing if I could supply any milk period, Phil and I settled on this pump and I'm very happy with it so far! It's easy to use and not as painful as I was afraid of.
 I received this as a gift from another new mom and I am so very thankful for it! My nipples are really starting to hurt/bleed a little because I'm trying so hard to establish my supply. I only started to use it this afternoon, but it has really soothed my aches and pains. 
 Not every child will love this, (and it doesn't come with a surly cat as seen here HAHA), but Jill takes after her mama in regards to an infant swing. If she's drowsy, all we have to do is swaddle her and put her in and she's out like a light! We don't even have to turn on the swinging motion for her to sleep comfortably :)
 As an early Christmas gift from my parents, we received the item I registered for that was just for mama :D So far? It's so great to make a single cup of coffee/tea/hot chocolate quickly. They also got us the cup you can use your own coffee beans with which works out great since we stocked up on coffee last month.
 Mommy's cocktail... an antibiotic, some generic pain medication, ibuprofin, stool softeners, calcium supplement, and prenatal vitamins. Lots of different things to take for different reasons, but they are all helping me feel pretty good considering what my body has been through this week.
 And of course, the sweetest face on the planet :)

For a little fun, here's an OOTD - Jillian edition:
On our way to the pediatrician. The hat is from a set gifted at a shower, the onesie says "Princess"in glittery letters and was part of a 3 pack of onesies here, some Hello Kitty leggings for newborns from here, and not in the photo is a cheap pair of ballet slipper socks from here. Isn't she precious?

The appointment with her doctor, Dr. V, (different Dr. V from my OB/GYN btw), went fairly well. She did lose 10% of her weight so she is 5 lbs and 12 oz. Dr. V isn't too concerned because he said my milk supply won't be coming in for another 2 days. We are going back on Saturday to weigh her again to see if she's still losing. If so, that means I'm not producing and we'll need to go over formula feeding with him. Other than that, she's incredibly healthy.

Jill did have an extra rough first night home. It was almost like having a different baby! She wouldn't sleep longer than 10 minutes at a time and could not seem to stop crying for more than 20 minutes. I barely got any sleep and worried the whole time that something was really wrong. I understand it's different, but she was sleeping so much better when we were still in the hospital. I know this because she stayed in our room all night long. Well, Dr. V gave her a little ready to drink formula like this and she immediately became calm again. He reiterated that it is because I'm not producing milk yet so not to worry. He suggested 1/2 oz of formula mixed with whatever comes out of my pump for the next few days. It's nice to have a doctor for your child that not only explains things, but also doesn't let you worry about things unless it's a real problem. Jill will be going for her 2 week appointment on the 29th and will be going for a state required hearing screening sometime next week. Lots to do, but I'm happy to do it for sure!

Love to all from Jill and myself :)

*I want to be clear that I was not asked to review any of these things by anyone. I just wanted to talk about what's helping me personally in case any other pregnant women/new mothers are curious.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Bébé Week 40 Update


Well here we are at my due date and not a single sign that she's coming today. I won't lie and say I'm not a little disappointed, but I know she'll be here soon. At least now I'll have all the belly pictures through week 40, (even though I didn't start from the beginning) :)

Today's date: December 10, 2011

How far along: 40 weeks

Total weight gain: 24 pounds total.

Size and growth of the baby: 
Jill is nearing the size of a small pumpkin (about 21" long, if she's going to be that long. Otherwise, she's whatever length she'll be born at)  and weighs near 7 1/2 pounds! She's ready for her arrival which means it's time to come on out Jilly!  {per}

Sex: Precious baby girl

Maternity clothes: Just about everything

Sleep: Overall I sleep great. I pop just about every joint as I attempt to change positions at night, but it never hurts. I wake up at least once a night to pee, if not more. I can get back to sleep pretty easily after that though.

Best moment(s) of the week: My mama getting into town and making my awesome cookies for the hospital staff.

Movement: Baby girl has had a few quiet days, but she always gets her kick count within 30 minutes or so, which tells me she's ok :)

Food cravings/aversions: No real aversions or cravings this week. In fact, I had a little less of an appetite than I did before. I had a PB&J sandwich for dinner the other night just to eat something.

Morning sickness: I take a Zofran almost every day and can keep food down. However, I do still have some moments of queasiness regardless of what I do or eat.

Symptoms: Baby bump, peeing constantly, waddling instead of walking, lots of stretch marks, lower abdomen pressure, baby kicks, some pelvic pain/cramps, some heartburn/acid, light Braxton Hicks, a little queasiness, and gassy.

Labor signs: I'll feel some Braxton Hicks from time to time, but it's mostly my belly getting hard all over. I feel tinges down there every so often as well. However, none of these hurt so it could just be practice stuff. Considering I didn't dilate or efface any more than my last appointment, I don't think these were true labor signs. 

Belly button in or out: In

What I miss: Not a whole heck of a lot :)

What I'm looking forward to: Jill's birth in the next 48 hours!

Weeks 20, 30, and 40...

But I Know What It Feels Like

This post is going to be awfully vulnerable and hard for me, but I really want to finally say it out loud. I got permission for my daughter ...