Thursday, July 29, 2010

Two Hands On The Wheel Of My Fate...

{via}
During my cross-country adventures in the car, I had to endure some challenges on the road. We have the angry guy who loves to give anyone the finger who doesn't move out of his way after tailgating WAY too closely for 30 seconds. Then we have the driver who drives a really old car with questionable tires as fast as they can in a pouring rain storm. Don't even get me started on semi-trucks.

I honestly think I'm a very good driver. I do drive pretty quickly overall, but I'm always safe and alert. I'm still skittish when it comes to driving in any weather condition involving precipitation, but I'm definitely better than before. With this in mind, I continuously began to ponder the question....

What makes a driver confident?

Is it confidence in their own skills? Confidence that everyone will get out of their way and do what they want? Or is it just a lack of understanding that they could get seriously hurt or die if they continue to drive so recklessly?

Could it be a combination of two or all the above?

Regardless of the answer to that question, I honestly believe in something: No matter where you are going, your punctuality does not trump another person's life. It's not their fault you didn't allot enough time to get where you're going. Medical emergencies are one thing, but I guarantee that many reckless drivers are not on their way to the ER. I doubt the 17 year-old in a tripped out Ford F-350 is in labor.

No matter what your confidence level, remember that we all share the road and we all have a life story. We're someone's child, friend, sibling, lover, and important to someone somewhere. Let's all calm down just a little and remember we're all on a journey :)

Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"Extraordinary Machine" by Fiona Apple
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

It was hard to pick just one song since I have several best friends :) I feel this really describes my relationship with each. Even though all are similar in some respects, they are all different people. Deep down, the common thread among them is me and my relationship with them. All are great listeners and seem to give me what I need exactly when I need it. I just pray I do the same for them :) So here's to my best friends, in no particular order: Phil, Janet, Chaz, Mikey, Annette, Carrie, Abbey, and Jess. I love you all whole-heartedly! Remember, I'm a lyrics person so check them out ;)

Happy Thursday!

Peace,
"Student Driver" by Stellar Kart

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

There's A Mansion, Oh That's Prepared Just For Me...

Wedding Wednesday

{via}
I have had a fairly boring past couple of days. Mostly me getting back in the swing of things. We're in the middle of VBS at Midwest City, which is one of my final acts as the volunteer youth director. This means I wake up at 6:30ish, go to work until 5pm, go straight to the church and help out until VBS ends around 8pm. I then go home, snack on something, go to bed, and start the cycle over again. Told ya it was boring.

So for lack of better things to blog about, I thought I'd start my own Wedding Wednesday series! I don't know how many weeks I'll spread this out for, so we'll see how it goes :) I love all things wedding and I can honestly say that I loved every moment about being engaged. I had fun with the planning process and everything! The only thing I didn't like was the feeling that I was NEVER getting married. I don't know how some people were engaged for 2+ years. The 1 1/2 was long enough to me!

Speaking of engagements, that's what my post today is! Because after all, you can't have a wedding without an engagement :)

Phil and I knew after we got back together in May of 2006 that we were in it for the long haul. Our relationship was very solid and we talked very seriously about our future together the entire summer. Shortly after school started, I made the suggestion that we look at rings at the mall. I mean, if he's going to get me a ring soon, he might as well know what I like ;) So we go to the local mall in OKC and stop at Zales. We look around for a little while, and then I saw it. THE ring. The one I have had dreams about. I swore the lights in that area became a little brighter as soon as my eyes locked in on this beautiful ring. I ask to try it on and it fits perfectly. Phil can tell I'm smitten because he can't stop smiling at me. As they talk about financing, the sales lady lets me keep it on. I am usually not a very vain person, but I could. not. stop. staring. at. this. ring. on. my. hand. I'd move it around, lay in on the table, and just giggle loudly on the inside as I imagine wearing this ring for the rest of my life. Once they finish up, she asks for it back and my heart breaks just a little :( I'm told the ring is on layaway and he'll be making payments for it.

Now, to be fair, I was a 20 year old who is about to make a big step in my life. I have watched "A Wedding Story" and "Perfect Proposal" on TLC for YEARS and I have an issue with relinquishing control. Knowing the perfect man had the perfect ring on layaway, I wanted to make sure he'd have the perfect proposal story. In order to do that, I had certain conditions. Again, I was a snotty 20 year old with high standards and big control issues. He had to keep this in mind, (no pressure Phil):
Cannot be on a holiday
Cannot be near my birthday
Preferably in the fall since it's my favorite season
Cannot be at a public place in front of hundreds of people
MUST be a surprise

I'm sure there were more, but those were the main ones.

Around November, my poor little head was reeling. When is he going to do it? How is he going to do it? Will I be surprised? Will it be a GOOD, romantic surprise? Will I be proud to tell people about it or embarrassed? How much longer must I wait? I thought about this all the time. Poor Phil and I were already having weekly fights because we missed each other. (Side note: at this point in our relationship, Phil had started grad school in Norman and I was still in Tulsa) This long distance relationship was really hard, but we knew it'd be worth it.

The week before Thanksgiving break, I have a conference in OKC. I've talked about O.I.L. (Oklahoma Intercollegiate Legislature) on here before and that's the conference I'm referring to. This particular year, we were staying at a really run down hotel just east of downtown. We were always looking for cheap hotels that didn't mind loud college students. Throughout the week, I would call Phil and talk, but we didn't have a lot of time to hang out. One particular afternoon, Saturday November 18th, I had a longer lunch than normal. I called up Phil and asked if we could hang out for awhile since I've been so busy. He agrees and we go to lunch. At once point in the conversation, I mention something about him making a payment on the ring, (which I still say to this day he told me he did, though he denies it every time). He tells me he hasn't done anything with the ring since we picked it out in early September. With this simple phrase, all those feeling of anxiety about worrying about getting engaged, and of course lack of sleep due to this conference, I just lose it. My blood starts to boil, my face gets hot and small flames appear in my eyes. I tell Phil that I'm tired of everything. Tired of worrying about when he does it, how he does it, etc. I told him to just do it when he's finally ready because I'm tired of thinking about it. With that, I tell him I need to head back, (which I did), and we'd talk later. The rest of the day, all I can think about is how awful I was. I continually tell my BFF, Annette, that I'm just being a brat and I need to make up with him. That evening was the O.I.L. Governor's Ball. This means I'd have to pay $10, ($20 if Phil came), to watch everyone get drunk and not eat anything because the food would be gone quickly. I text Phil while we're still in session and asks if he'd be willing to accept my apology and go to dinner with me, just the two of us. He tells me sure and I feel better the rest of the time. When Annette and I go back to our hotel room, she started to change for the ball while I relaxed by watching "The Wedding Singer" on TV. I heard a knock on the door, and have a feeling it's Phil.

Phil walks into the room holding a wrapped box. It's wrapped in Christmas paper and I ask him what it's for. He tells me it's a gift to say "I'm sorry" for our fight earlier. I told him that wasn't necessary, but thanks anyways. I unwrap the gift and it's a Cinderella snowglobe from Walgreen's that I had seen a few weeks earlier. I thank Phil telling him he's really sweet. He tells me to flip it over to listen to the song it plays.

Time Out: It was explained to me that when life altering things happen to you, you have no idea what's going on. I always thought I'd figure out when Phil would propose. He (and I) don't have much of a poker face. Looking back now, I could have flipped the snowglobe in it's box to hear the song, but I just naturally took it out of the box anyways. Funny.... Time In:

I open the box, and take the snowglobe out. I flip it over and see this...



I quickly look up at Phil who is now on the other side of the bed from me on one knee. He says something beautiful I'm sure, but my ears are burning and ringing too loudly. Whether he asked me to be his wife or to marry him, I said yes, surprisingly very softly since I can be pretty loud. Phil stands up but stays on the other side of the bed. I tell him he can join me and he walks slowly over to me. Phil told me later that was one of the scariest moments of his life. I'm sure he was still calming down afterwards. We have our picture taken, but I never did ever see it. That's ok with me because I had been dressed up and running around for over 12 hours that day. We go to Chili's in Midwest City for our dinner and then stop at my parents house to announce the good news :)


This is our hands on the way to Chili's




These were taken at Phil's Norman apartment the next day after church

Here's the infamous snowglobe

In the end, it didn't matter how the perfect man gave me the perfect ring. All that mattered was he was going to be mine and he chose me. I couldn't believe the man that God created just for me was in my life so early on. How blessed am I that I am married to my best friend? Very much so. I am proud to tell my engagement story to anyone that cares because he did do a wonderful job AND followed all the criteria I asked him to :)

And no, I didn't forget the music!
Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"No More Night" by David Phelps
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

Hope y'all are having a great week so far! Halfway to Friday...

Peace,
"No More Night" By David Phelps

Friday, July 23, 2010

Til We've Seen This Journey Through...

{Our Wedding 5.24.08 - Pictures Via}
I'm back! My last two days in Minnesota were a little hectic because we were trying to squeeze in lots of stuff before I left. After that, my mom and I drove to Walnut Grove and on to Sioux City. Then I went to Kansas City the next day and then finally home on Wednesday evening. I didn't have internet for a few days, hence the absence. Plus, once I got home, I had a lot going on before I was settled enough to write.

I have been a terrible blogger friend! I've been keeping up with everyone, but I haven't made any comments. I'll think of comments, and then forget to post them. Now worries, I'm on a mission and nothing can stop me :)

I'll do a small picture post of my trip. I really did have a great time and I can't thank my parents enough for everything. I love them!

Yesterday was a little rough. First of all, it was the first day back at the office and the first day that co-workerladyma'am was gone. Her desk is cleaned out, (and clean! lol), and it made me sad :( I know we'll keep in touch and she'll visit every so often, but I doubt any other co-worker will be as cool/nerdy/abletoputupwithme like her :) Plus, we share the same name. THat automatically makes her awesome HAHA! Well, I was left alone during the afternoon and, long story short, I made a mess of things without realizing what was going on. I should have picked up on it and I was mad. I was pretty busy because I had lots of phone calls in the afternoon and other orders to do, but it was something I should have been on top of. Luckily Bossman knows what he's doing and it sounds like everything is working itself out. At least today is Friday right?!

During my lunch break, I had to go to the doctor and give blood so they could check my levels, as per the deal with my doctor about leaving town. Well, the guy that usually does this was busy so a girl sits me down. Something made me a little nervous when I noticed she didn't have all the supplies, (the tubes your blood goes into), when she got started. As soon as she stuck me, I said "OW!" really loudly out loud. I haven't done that in years... RED FLAG! Well, she then reaches for the tubes and does her thing. It hurt SO bad even as soon as I was walking out the front door to my car. I started to cry in the car because it hurt so much. I took some Motrin as Phil suggested and tried to rest it as best I could. I later tried to get the tape off and I saw this...
Yeah. She butchered my arm. That woman is never touching me again! Luckily I got a call from the doctor later in the day saying that my levels are at negative which means I don't have to see her again until my annual appointment or if I get pregnant again. Thank goodness!! My arm still looks awful, but it's not as sore anymore.

After work, Phil and I went grocery shopping. I'm tracking with Weight Watchers again and we barely had anything to eat. We spent way more than I thought we were going to, but I know we needed it. I guess that's why you don't go shopping once there's nothing left LOL Then I bought the 30 Day Shred workout video because I know several people who have used it and recommend it. Plus, I've always been a fan of Jillian :) Well, Phil did it with me and it was ROUGH. I should not have pushed so hard since it was my first time and because of my arm. It was probably funny to see Phil and I crawling up the stairs so we could clean up and go to bed. We were so sore!! I'm still kinda sore this morning, but not as badly as I thought I would be. I do think we'll wait until we're a little more in shape to do it again. We'll find another way to work out until then :)

Now onto the music.
Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding

Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"The Servant Song" by David Haas
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

It was hard to pick which song to use since our wedding has already happened. However, this is one of the few songs I had on my computer :) This is the song my wonderful and talent friend (since 9th grade!) sang and played on the guitar during our unity candle. I still get compliments about the great singer I had! I just love the lyrics to this song. That's why I felt it was important to us as a newly married couple to hear immediately after our vows. Now when I hear it, it makes me tear up, (especially verse 4).

Phil and I have been through so much since our wedding 2 years ago. Even with all the hard stuff, I wouldn't change any of it and I know I wouldn't have made it through without the amazing, loving, and Christian husband that God designed just for me. I love you Phil :) *mush*

Happy Friday everyone!

Peace to you,

"The Servant Song" by Richard Gillard

Friday, July 16, 2010

Let Me Watch You Break It Down...

{via}
We had to rearrange our plans for the next few days, but we still had fun! I watched the 4th Harry Potter with my mom, (I brought all 6 for us to watch, per her request), jumped in the shower then headed to the golf course with my dad. I found out I'm not fantastic, but I'm not too horrible either. I just need to practice. It'll be hard because we don't have any clubs, but I'll figure something out. Originally we were going to the capitol with my mom afterwards, but we missed the last tour of the day. Instead, we went to the movies. My dad and I saw this, while my mom saw what I watched yesterday. Both were really good movies and now we're relaxing at home.

I got kind of upset by someone's status on facebook today. Thank goodness for Livejournal! I had quite the rant that was just a little too angry for me to share here. That's ok. Just typing it up made me feel better :) Plus, I know it's nothing I can control or fix. That's such a hard thing for me.

I'm starting to really miss Phil. I wish he were up here with me more than me wishing to be home. Either way, I'm ready to be in his loving embrace again :) Skype just isn't the same as being next to him.

The past two nights we had to read the book Song of Songs for our daily bible reading. I apparently have a 13-year-old boy deep inside of me because I could not stop giggling. This made Phil laugh and it just got worse through the book. I'm really glad it was only two days because I don't think I could handle a 3rd day. Poor Phil was trying so hard to be serious and I was just messing it all up ;)

Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"Just Dance" by Lady Gaga
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

I know it's self-explainatory, but I just love me some Gaga!

Hope your weekend is wonderful!

Peace to you,

"Just Dance" by Lady Gaga

Thursday, July 15, 2010

It's Easy If You Do It Right...

{via}
Today has been weird for me. I woke up, had a leisurely breakfast and then practiced my voice lesson songs. Practicing would be weird by itself, (I'm not very good at practicing), but something else happened: I had a driving adventure.

What's a driving adventure?

It's something my mom came up with when we moved to Oklahoma. It was her way of learning how to get around since we were still figuring out the area. We would drive around on different roads just to see where they went. Sometimes it was on purpose and other times it just happened. No matter what, we always found our way home.

Now today, it was purely by accident. I decided I wanted to go out and do something today. I get the house key and garage door opener from a drawer in the laundry room and headed towards a mall. Well, there's a larger mall a little further from my folks house and I decided that would be better to go to. As I came to the exit for the mall, I saw a sign for downtown St Paul and changed my mind again. I've wanted to visit the capitol for awhile now and thought it'd be fun. Needless to say, it didn't happen. I have a great talent of hitting every. single. green light in town when I don't know where I'm going. I somehow ended up in the middle of downtown St Paul and had no place to pull in a get my bearings. All the metered spots were taken, I didn't want to pay $12 to park for 2 minutes and I didn't have my gps with me. I finally gave up and headed back to my folks' house. I see another sign for Stillwater, MN and remember my mom is always talking about the great shopping they have! I change course again and head that way. After driving for a few minutes, I feel like I should be going with someone else so I don't get lost. I exit unto a street I recognize and just start driving around White Bear Lake. I end up going to a theater near my parents' old apartment and go to see a movie. I was hoping I'd be the only one, but 4 kids walked in right as the movie started. The movie was great! It was funny, sweet, and it made me tear up a little at the end. Definitely worth the money/drive ;) The only issue I had was the fact that none of the other viewers laughed! I felt silly laughing out loud at times. Oh well, didn't mess up my viewing experience! After that, my parents were headed home so I did the same.

My dad and I will be going to the driving range tomorrow afternoon! I have decided that I'd like to learn how to play golf! It seems random, I know, but it's something I've always wanted to learn. Hopefully I'm not too bad at it. If nothing else, it will be comic relief for my daddy-o ;) Also, my mom and I will be making a trip on Sunday night to Sioux City to see my grandma. Then on our way home Monday, we'll be stopping at Walnut Grove to see the Laura Ingalls Wilder museum and dugout site!! If you don't know, I've loved the Little House on the Prairie book series since I was young. My mom bought the series for me and would read the stories to me before bed. I've always felt a connection to Laura and loved everything about the books. We've visited several of the other places she has lived, but we're not quite done with the list. I think we'll have 2 more places after Walnut Grove, but I'm not entirely sure. I'm pretty excited about going though! Plus, I'll be able to show my grandma pictures from my trip to San Diego over spring break. She used to live in Santa Ana and I know she'll love seeing the pictures :)

Day 7 of my 25 Days of Music
Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"Misery Business" by Paramore
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

Judge me if you will, but one of my best friends since high school, Jess, and I love Paramore. Jess and I were driving somewhere one day and we decided we wanted to learn all the words to this song. So we put it on repeat, I took out the words and we sang it over and over together. I don't know if Jess still knows them, but I know I certainly do ;)

Hope you're having a great day and remember... tomorrow's Friday!

Peace to you,
"Misery Business" by Paramore

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Know That We'll Still Have Each Other...

{via}

I've made it to Minnesota! I've actually been here since dinner time on Friday, but we've had some internet problems. Now that those are finally resolved, here I am! I am missing Phil a lot, but it's nice to be around my folks again. It was a little hard to relinquish my control of the remote control and deciding on what's for dinner, but I don't mind too much ;) It's stormy today, but I'm home alone for the majority of it. Both my folks had to work today and I understand. I should probably practice my voice lesson songs anyways. I hate practicing anything musical if someone's home. I'd rather people hear me polished.

I've been doing a few more home searches in the areas we're moving to. I've heard about this, but I'm finally experiencing it. What we could get for $140,000 in Oklahoma, we don't get as much other places. I just have 4 things I'm looking for: 1) a garage, 2) a decently sized kitchen (though I'm not opposed to big ;D), 3) a decent sized yard (since we want a dog soon), and 4) air conditioning. I may be from Oklahoma and used to the heat, but I'm also used to having air conditioning. Even with a unit, I have at least 2 fans on at our apartment now! I'm sure we're going to find a great starter home. Part of the problem is we're not able to see any of these homes until we're about ready to move! I wish I could just drive down the street to see them, but I just have to rely on the pictures. Some of the pictures are awful too. The only home with good pictures and decorating that doesn't make me want to startpaintingassoonasIarrive turned out to be my friend Laura's. HAHA how funny is that?! The search continues because planning is what I do. I focus ahead and charge on.

I'm still processing everything, as to be expected. However, I feel like I'm really dealing well with everything. I think I was so worried something would happen that, when it did, I was mentally prepared for it. It's not easy and I'm going to be a little messy for awhile. I do believe that Phil and I are going to be great parents whenever God decides to bless us with a healthy baby. Even if we have to adopt our children, we will still love them with every ounce of our heart. Besides, we're still young yet ;) My parents are great listeners so I've been feeling really good about everything.

Before I do my 25 days of music, here's the song I was telling you about. The recording I have is from Glee, but it originated from the musical Cabaret (and made famous by Liza Minnelli). If you listen to the words, it's a sad song. However, I feel like it's more hopeful than woeful so don't read too much into it :)

Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"Maybe This Time" by Kristin Chenoweth & Lea Michele

Now onto Day 6
Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

I picked this song because it reminds me of Scotland. On my trip with PLS all around Scotland, there was a pub near the University of Edinburgh that we visited on several occasions. Instead of a regular jukebox, it played music videos on the TVs around the pub. For whatever reason, every time we went to this pub, this song/video would play. When I hear it, it takes me back and I can't help but smile :)

Hope y'all are having a great week!

Peace to you,
"Umbrella" by Rihanna & Jay-Z

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Even Though The Rough Times Are Showing...

{via}
I have been an emotional wreck the past 24 hours. Well, more like 36. Shortly after my post yesterday, I got a call from the nurse saying my levels were the same. Apparently that's not bad, but it's ideal and Dr. Vaughan wanted me to come do another round of shots and blood tests so that my level will go back down to zero. I got off the phone and literally started to bawl my eyes out. I had JUST finished making a pile of clothes for laundry to pack so I could leave for Minnesota. I made the executive decision and now I couldn't go. I had no idea what my number was in terms of my hCG level and I was tired.

SICK and tired.

Tired of being poked and prodded. Tired of not knowing what was happening to me and my body. Tired of not having the permission to do anything but sit at home and "relax". Tired of only seeing my husband, (though I love him more than anything), and knowing I couldn't see my parents for an even longer amount of time. I just couldn't take it. I of course call Phil very upset. He tried his best to calm me down, but I knew I would need to call my mom. I do and we talked for quite awhile. She knows that this is hard for me. This had been a really rough two weeks for me.

This is what I've endured since June 19th: Find out I'm pregnant, then told my levels are low. Go to two different doctors in an attempt to make the insurance company happy and end up getting blood drawn 5 times in one week. Pray that everything will be ok only to find out late the pregnancy is no longer viable and have 3 ultrasounds to confirm this. Get more blood drawn and receive two shots in the hiney to chemically dissolve the pregnancy. Have no idea what's going on because no one is really explaining to me what is happening. Told I can't see my parents until everything is "fine", whatever that means. Give MORE blood (that's #9 btw) and told I need another shot to help bring my levels to normal. I am going insane. Seriously, my mental state is not fantastic right now. I felt bad, but I couldn't stop crying on the phone with my mom. Plus, I don't know why, but I kept cracking jokes while I was crying. Who does that? Really?

My mom told me to call and tell them I need someone to explain this to me. Tell me what's going on and how things are going happen. She did offer to come down here if I can't leave soon, but I end up getting permission from the doctor this morning to go if I want to. I did have to come in for my second round of shots this morning and I have to check in with her when I get back. Ok, I can do that. I can tell the doctor is not happy with me doing this, but right now I don't care. I need my parents more than ever and I'm an adult in stable condition. Besides, I'm not making the trip in one day. I promised my dad I'd stop in KC on the way up and that's what I'll do. I can't wait to get on the road tomorrow.

One of my blogger friends, that I met on LJ a few years ago, is talking about making an LJ again to be a little more personal. I've actually been thinking about this for awhile now. I wouldn't get rid of this blog, but I really need somewhere to vent out all my bad stuff. I can get really depressing and hateful and I'd rather put my happy energy in here. I don't want to be labeled the "Debbie Downer" around the blog-o-sphere ;) I'm still thinking about it, but we'll see what happens.

Now that you've endured all of that, on to the music :)
Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io

"Walking On The Sun" by Smash Mouth
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

The person I'm referring to should know who they are ;)

Speaking of music, thanks to the Glee soundtracks from Season 1, I have a song I REALLY want to include in recital in December. Have I mentioned I'm giving a recital in December in celebration of my graduation? Oh yes, yes I am :) It's going to be marvelous! If I can, I'll share a recording of some type on here afterwards. We'll see how it all works out. I will share the song next time I post.

Happy Wednesday y'all!

Peace to you,
"And I'm Telling You I'm Not Going" by Glee Cast Member Amber Riley

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

No Answer On The Telephone...

{via}
I hope y'all had a good 4th of July weekend! Mine was... memorable for sure. I had cramps and nausea most of the weekend, but I was starting to get cabin fever from being stuck indoors all day long. I didn't receive a call about my levels until this morning which caused more anxiety. In a desperate attempt to do something, Phil and I decided to travel up to Tulsa for fireworks around 5pm. Talk about last minute ;) We walked to Riverside where we sat through 3 waves of rain, mosquitoes and gnats, and a guy who somehow got past the baracades and started driving down the street where people we're sitting to watch the show. That almost turned into a nasty fight thanks to the influence of some choice drinks and the classy people in the area. Oy. Again, it was definitely memorable. We spent the night at the in-laws and I got to see my two best friends before we left to go home.

I had to give more blood this morning, but I've decided I'm leaving for Minnesota tomorrow. Unless I hear that my levels went up, (which they shouldn't), I'm going. I'm running out of time because I have work and school and other things in my life. Yes, my parents always have a place for me, but I just don't have the time to continue delaying this trip. Sorry Dr. Vaughan, it's a matter of my mental health at this point. Besides, I'm pretty sure they have doctors and hospitals in the Twin Cities area right? lol

Since I'm behind, here's my 25 Days of Music post :)

Day 01 - Your favorite song
Day 02 - Your least favorite song
Day 03 - A song that makes you happy
Day 04 - A song that makes you sad

Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
"Your Heart Will Lead You Home" by Kenny Loggins
Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 14 - A song that describes you
Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
Day 20 - A song from your childhood
Day 21- A song with great lyrics
Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

Yes, it's from the Tigger Movie soundtrack. It always makes me homesick and I always want a hug when I hear it.

Peace to you,

"Alone" by Heart

Friday, July 2, 2010

One Day You'll See Her...

I hope y'all are liking the new look :) I'm still stuck on the couch while my medicine continues to work. I feel nauseous off and on and cramps from time to time, but nothing too bad so far. I did get a call from the nurse at Dr. Vaughan's office telling me that my levels from Wednesday already showed a drop. Hopefully I can get a good reading tomorrow. I'm ready to be with my parents. Phil had to go to work today so I'll be home alone until 10:30ish. Hopefully I can talk to my mom around 8 or so. My parents sent me some sweet flowers yesterday. The card said "These will have to do until we can give you a real hug" Aww.... I love them :)

Like I promised, here is the recipe for the turkey burgers we had on Monday night. Now, we actually made several changes to this recipe and I'll note them as I go along. First, here's a picture to entice you ;)
{via}
Yummmm :)

Here's the recipe:

BBQ Chicken Burgers with Slaw by Rachael Ray

Ingredients:
1 tablespoon butter, cut into pieces

  • 1 small red onion, 1/2 finely chopped, 1/2 thinly sliced **We omitted this and it was still good**

  • 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped

  • 2 tablespoons tomato paste

  • 1 teaspoon sugar

  • 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce, eyeball it

  • 1 tablespoon hot sauce, eyeball it **We always have Tabasco on hand**

  • 1 1/4 pounds ground chicken **We used ground turkey**

  • 1 tablespoons grill seasoning (recommended: McCormick brand) a palm full

  • 3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, divided

  • 2 tablespoons honey, eyeball it

  • 1 lemon, juiced

  • 3 rounded tablespoons sweet pickle relish **I think we omitted this as well**

  • 2 cups shredded cabbage mix

  • Salt and pepper

  • 4 cornmeal Keiser rolls, split **We used good ol' hamburger buns**

  • Directions:

    In a small skillet over medium heat, melt butter. Add chopped onions, garlic and tomato paste and sweat them for 5 minutes to soften and sweeten. Sprinkle in sugar and remove from heat. Cool in a bowl, 5 minutes. Add tomato paste mixture, Worcestershire, hot sauce to bowl and combine. Add chicken to the bowl then grill seasoning and combine the burgers well to evenly distribute the flavors and form 4 patties. Wash up.

    Heat 1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil, a turn of the pan, in a nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Cook patties 6 minutes on each side.

    Combine the honey, lemon juice, and remaining extra-virgin olive oil in a bowl. Add relish, cabbage mix and sliced onions and season with salt and pepper. Toss the slaw to coat and reserve.

    Serve burgers on bun bottoms topped with slaw and bun tops.

    I promise you won't be disappointed if you try this out. Plus, I love me some Rachael Ray and didn't realize it was her recipe until I looked it up myself!

    Day 01 - Your favorite song
    Day 02 - Your least favorite song
    Day 03 - A song that makes you happy


    Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io
    "This Side" by Nickel Creek
    Day 04 - A song that makes you sad
    Day 05 - A song that reminds you of someone
    Day 06 - A song that reminds you of somewhere
    Day 07 - A song that you know all the words to
    Day 08 - A song that you can dance to
    Day 09 - A song that you want to play at your wedding
    Day 10 - A song that you want to play at your funeral
    Day 11 - A song that makes you think of your best friend
    Day 12 - A song that is a guilty pleasure
    Day 13 - A song that no one would expect you to love
    Day 14 - A song that describes you
    Day 15 - A song from your favorite album
    Day 16 - A song from your favorite band
    Day 17 - A song from a band you can't stand
    Day 18 - A song that makes you laugh
    Day 19- A song that you wish you could play
    Day 20 - A song from your childhood
    Day 21- A song with great lyrics
    Day 22- A song you love with no lyrics
    Day 23 - A song that you can play on an instrument
    Day 24 - A song that you could never get tired of
    Day 25 - Your favorite song at this time last year

    This song always makes me smile. I'm always joking that songs are about me. However, this song describes my soul and no matter what's going on with me, my life, my loved ones, etc., it always brings a smile to my face. It's also where I got my blog name from! I hope you enjoy it too :)

    Peace to you,


    "This Side" by Nickel Creek

    But I Know What It Feels Like

    This post is going to be awfully vulnerable and hard for me, but I really want to finally say it out loud. I got permission for my daughter ...