And I Admit I Have Been Lax...

{via}

Well long time no type. I could drone on and on about how my sleep patterns are not getting any better and how my school year is turning more into an endurance test than school. I could, but I won't.

I don't think I said anything on here, but I listed my blog for an assignment in my creative writing class. We have to have 10 entries by the end of the year. I thought it would be a piece of cake and even joked with my mom that I hope my male professor loves my Wedding Wednesday posts. Then something changed...

I was suddenly overcome with fear of being judged. Now, I do understand the concept of a public blog. Anyone at anytime and any place in the world (with internet connections) can find this blog and read it. They can read about my miscarriages. They can read about my wedding stories. They can even read when I'm being a snobby ex-sorority girl. However, there IS a difference to me. When people read it, I don't have to see them. Sure, my parents read this from time to time, but they already know me. Sure, I could meet some of my blogger friends in real life and that would make it a little different. Again, the difference is, I don't think anyone who has ever commented on my blog has judged me in a negative way. If they have, they have kept their mouth shut.

It's fine if you disagree with me on things. It's fine if you think some of the things I get mad or sad or happy about are silly. You may even think my fashion sense is absolutely atrocious. But I don't have to see you 3 hours a week. Anyone who reads my blog gets a good sense of who I truly am because I try to be as honest as I can. However, I don't want the super artsy people in my class that love writing with every fiber of their being to judge my poor little blog and all it's superficial glory.

After submitting a short story assignment where I actually just wrote a dramatized version of one of the many dates-gone-wrong evenings Phil and I have had, I didn't separate myself enough from the story to accept some of the criticism my classmates gave me. Then it hit me...

I don't need to impress them. I don't care about them and they don't know the real me. I'm graduating in December and I may never see some of these people again in my life. I don't owe them an explanation of myself and I don't need to impress them. I can't be everyone's friend and I shouldn't even try.

So here I am, (just in time for mid-terms. Yikes!), ready to come back to my bloggy world. Ready to continue posting about my life and how I feel about it. I don't care if you don't like it. If you have enough free time to waste going to various blogs just to complain, then I will delete your comment and not think a thing of it. I have no time for bullshit and I will not tolerate it from any anonymous* people, who I may or may not actually know in real life. In return, I promise to not give out bullshit. I feel like it's a fair trade :)

*I learned a lesson my 9th grade year from a very influential woman in my life. She just happened to be my English AND Leadership teacher that year. If you have the guts to say something either out loud or written, have the guts to sign your name to it. If you can't stand by your words, then they are not worth saying

On that note... I have my Friday Five list for today! Tomorrow I am going to the fair with one of my closest friends and dragging our husbands along. Here are my top 5 foods I love to get at the fair!

1. Kettle Corn - Thanks to my mama, I have a great love for popcorn. Every year, I'd buy her a big bag and bring it home where she would share with me while we cuddled on the couch. Who knew starchy foods brought back such good memories ;) Kettle corn is a definite must in my book

2. Funnel Cake - I can get funnel cakes at any type of outdoor event in Oklahoma. However, this is one of the few foods Phil does not mind sharing with me. Plus, who can argue with a classic?

3. Lemonade - I just love getting the freshly squeezed lemonade and keeping the large plastic cup for future drinking needs at home! (I can hear my mother screaming right now... *she despises large plastic cups since they do not fit in the dishwasher well*)

4. Deep Fried Snickers - You can't be as cubby as me without liking something this bad for you. However, it is the only time in the entire year that I ever eat this. I love how the chocolate is really melt-y in the center.... *drools a little*

5. Fried Pickles - I love pickles! What else can I say ;)

AND as an added bonus for being patient during my sudden hiatus, (I know you're on the edge of your seats), here is another Friday Five! The top 5 Foods at the Fair I do not understand people liking.

1. Fried Butter - Now y'all, I love Paula Deen, her recipes and her accent more than anything. However, just because she loves it doesn't mean we should all try it. Please be a little nicer to your heart than that!

2. Indian Tacos - They are HUGE around Oklahoma. I don't think they're super great so I don't understand the point.

3. Krispy Kreme Hamburgers - This is a brand new thing this year, but it sounds just awful! My heart is aching just from hearing the name *gag*

4. Deep Fried Twinkies - Maybe I just don't like Twinkies as much as everyone else, but this just sounds gross to me. Then again, I like the Snickers bar so I don't have much room to judge ;)

5. Spaghetti on a Stick - Just. plain. wrong.

Happy Friday!!

Peace to you,

"I Stand Corrected" by Vampire Weekend (In honor of the AWESOME concert I got to go to with Phil & Annette!)