Friday, September 25, 2015

That Feeling In Church

I'm so thankful it's fall! I love this time of year :) I'm hoping to make a new wreath for our front door, but we'll see when I have time.

Wednesdays and Thursdays are going to be extra long days for us. Once everything is in full swing, (I'm just missing Handbell practice for now), we will be at church from 5-8:30 pm Wednesdays, and 6-9 pm on Thursdays. This doesn't include the 25-30 minute commute to/from our house, plus Jillian has preschool both of those mornings. I try not to schedule any doctors' appointments or anything if I can help it, but that doesn't always work out. Don't get me wrong, I love this! I'm not sure I'd know what to do if we weren't this busy. And despite Jillian throwing a fit about not wanting to go home while David runs down the hall as fast as he can so he doesn't have to go to the car, (and trust me, he's fast!), I'm secretly glad they are so happy at church. I'm glad it's a place they don't want to leave. I'm glad they are comfortable there :)

I had a conversation with my friend, Angie, the other day. She made a comment about how someone once told her that they felt like the only broken person at our church. That they are the only one with issues, and that these perfect people attend a perfect church and they are the black sheep. While a part of me laughed because I know our church is far from perfect, it really got me thinking. I can see where they came up with that idea. Most people I know, at our church and other churches across the world, don't mention what they did wrong that week. Most of us go, and don't bring up what our struggles have been or why we are in desperate need of Jesus. Then I wondered about myself.

Growing up as a pastor's kid, or PK, is a completely different experience than any other child at the church. Even if your parents are well-intentioned, and do their best to give you a "normal experience," it will still be different. This is not necessarily a bad thing. One positive thing it instilled in me is the importance of church family. Having a relationship with those you worship next to is very important. In every church family I've had throughout my life, I do have those whom I trust with my brokenness. There are a few people in my church family who know that extent of me. When I come in on Sunday morning, it is not my intention to deceive anyone else at church. I'm not a walking band-aid! Instead, my thought is, "Jesus loves me despite myself, these people love me despite myself, so let's take a deep breath, give a sigh of relief, and worship God!" That's what I experience every time I walk through those doors for worship.

I'm not sure if I can personally remedy that person's perception of our church. I just know that I am now more aware of my actions and words, and I hope that will ease some of that in some way :)

Happy Fall, Y'all!

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