Not only am I trying to get the apartment ready for the big Minnesota trip, but we've had some really emotional ups and downs the past four days. I'm emotionally spent because it's all or nothing. I either have a fantastic day, (like yesterday with our play date with Miss Ashley and Addi Claire, the crib coming in several days early, and Jillian being very playful), or a really awful day, (like Monday and today with our closet smelling like pot again, Jillian is in an awful mood, and Phil gets disheartening news about his defense/dissertation).
I honestly just need to give all of this to God. I cannot handle all of it and I am just making myself sick with worry. I just want Phil to be able to accomplish his goal. I want to get my long to-do list done. I want Jillian to be a happy girl. I want our road trip to be successful. Holy Moly I have a lot on my plate.
Deep down, I know it's going to work out. However, I'm just so overwhelmed being in the middle of it that I can't see the positive. And honestly? Sometimes I worry that I'll jinx everything by being positive. I know that sounds stupid, but I've always been like that.
To end on a happy note, here are two photos I snapped yesterday of Miss Jillian yesterday before our walk by the lake.
{Miss Cool}
{I'm sure this will embarrass her someday, but it's awesome for me :)}
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