Give It Up Baby, I Hear Your Goodbye...

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First and foremost, I want to sincerely thank everyone from the bottom of my heart. Your thoughts, prayers, and sweet comments really helped me these past 10 days.

Secondly, if you can't think of anything else to say to me, please don't let it include the phrase "it just wasn't the right time." I'm actually dealing with this rather well and I feel like I'm well aware that this is not my fault. This was clearly a natural occurrence that would have happened no matter what. Even just a happy face to tell me you're thinking of me is all I need right now.

I got a phone call around 3:30 from Dr. Vaughan telling me that my hCG level was only at 96. This means I no longer have a viable pregnancy. All my signs and symptoms over the weekend were due to my progesterone medicine. I have to do an ultrasound at 10am then meet with the doctor to discuss how she wants to proceed. It sounds like she'll be giving me a prescription that will cause me to jump start my period and help me push out everything. Then I have to stay around until my levels are at 0 again. This also means I can't leave town to be with my parents until everything is ok. And of course, now I want them around more than ever.

I actually had an ultrasound thanks to my OU doctor and it sounds like it's a tubal pregnancy. With my hormones still under 100, it may not take too long to get my levels back to my non-pregnant state.

I'm doing ok for now. I'm sure letting it sink in after a few days, I'll be singing a different tune. For now, I'm just taking things a step at a time. As the inspiring Angie Smith said, "I think that my Jesus is the same as He was before I walked into this room." I have no reason to blame God and if anything, I'm glad he showed me that nothing is impossible. I was told getting pregnant would be hard and He proved my doctors wrong.

Again, I really do appreciate all of you and value your friendship even more. The next few days will be pretty hard so if you don't mind, please think about Phil and I while we figure this out together.

Peace to you,

"Cry" by Faith Hill