Then What Could Stand Against...

First and foremost, thank you to everyone who prayed or crossed their fingers for me this week. I honestly believe this is what helped get me through the week. I cannot express just how thankful I am to have such supportive group of people in my life. Thank you times a million :) {{{HUGS}}}

Secondly, I figured I'd give you a run down of my week and let you know what I do. I'm pretty hopeful and calm for now, but still scared and worried. However, I figure most first time moms are a little on edge anyways ;)

{via}

Saturday

Knowing that it was my one year anniversary for my early early miscarriage, (it wasn't even officially confirmed by a doctor yet), I had no idea how to treat the day. I already knew that Phil would have to work from 11-7 so I'd be home alone most of the day. I spent a good part of the day in bed just relaxing. Plus, it was so hot outside, I didn't want to do anything. Around noon, I decided to move to the couch and watch a movie. I watch "The First Wives Club" on Netflix and really enjoyed it! The last 20 minutes of the movie, I decided to use my 3 lb weights and do some arm exercises since I want toned arms for Annette's wedding in May. After that I look around and realize I need to pick up the apartment. I had a guest staying over the next night and we just had trash everywhere. I change into some different clothes and go at it. Now, being the Aries that I am, I have a tendency to get distracted very easily. I was looking through our wedding guest book and got an idea for my Matron of Honor toast at Annette's wedding. As I search for a notebook, I make a quick stop to the bathroom. Now, I had gotten what I assumed was my period exactly a week ago. Now that I look back on it, it wasn't has heavy as it usually is and I did not have the cramping I usually do. However, I was so distracted by the wedding I was in, I didn't even think about it. Well, three days after my period was supposed to be over, I had some very light brown spotting going on. For whatever reason beyond my own understanding, I thought I'd use the last old pregnancy test I had. I think mostly to get it out of my bathroom. So I do my thing and lay in on the edge of the tub. I vividly remember saying out loud "It's going to be negative. I don't know what the hell I'm doing this for". So I get up, wash my hands and do my own thing. About a minute later, I walk over to the restroom and I see this faint line on the test making it a plus sign. My heart literally stopped for a moment and I got all shaky. I ran back to my bed and just sat there breathing for a minute. I go back and pick up the test and sure enough, there's a faint line. Being an old test, I didn't have the box or instructions. So I call my friend Jess because I needed someone to quickly look at this and tell me I'm not crazy. She comes with our friend Laci and they took me to Walgreen's for a new test. I got a two pack of the digital so I wouldn't misread it. I take the digital test and walk away. The two of them go over and eventually tell me what I already knew: it said pregnant. We hugged, Laci cried and Jess jumped up and down several times. I always promised Phil I'd tell him in a creative way so we went looking for some unisex booties, (which is NOT easy btw), and stuck them in an old shoe box. When he got home from work, I told Phil I bought something so he couldn't be mad at me. I said, "You know how you've been talking about needing new sneakers? Well, I got you this at the store today" and I hand him the box. He opens it and says "Aww, that's cute. Also, it's one less thing for us to buy later" and he sets it next to him on the couch. I stand a look back and forth between him and the box for a few seconds. I finally say "You know what that means right?!" He stares and me with a confused look on his face and shifts his eyes for about 10 seconds before his eyes get huge. "Wait a minute. Does this mean...?" "Yeah" "And you found out today?!" "Yes" "What... How... Wa..... Didn't you... But you had your period last week!" "I know, I thought so too!" "So... wow" "Yeah." After that we just kind of sat around the apartment not knowing what to do and just processing the information.

Sunday

Phil had to work again, but I gave me a fitting Father's Day card that he showed off at work. We didn't do a whole lot that day, but that was fine with me.

Monday

I call to get an appointment with my normal OB-GYN Dr. Vaughan. I'm told to just come by anytime and pick up the paperwork to do a blood test. After my ceramics class, I go by and do my test. As soon as I get to work afterwards, I get a phone call from the doctor. "Mrs Coghill?" "This is she" "Well, you just left here didn't you?" *heart starts to pound* "Yep, I sure did." "Well guess what?" *heart stops and mind starts to scream "this isn't a professional way to start a conversation!"* "What?" "I missed on of the tests on the orders so you'll need to come back and do it." *sigh of relief/frustration* "Oh ok." So I got get stuck for a second time in one day. I get a call later informing me that only half my results came back so they can't give me full details. However, my HCG is low so I could be fine or I could be having a miscarriage. After they get the full results, the doctor will call and have me come for another test most likely. Lovely. Before bed, Phil and I discover our insurance through OU does have maternity coverage so I'd need a referral appointment from their health center. We make an appointment for the next day.

Tuesday

I spend the WHOLE morning waiting for Dr. Vaughan's office to call. I start to stress out and really worry. After what seems like forever, I get out of class and head to Norman for the referral appointment. As I'm walking in the doors of the women's center, my phone rings. The nurse from Dr. Vaughan's office informs me that my progesterone is a little low as well so they'll be sending a prescription for some progesterone ASAP. Also, I will need to come in for another blood test to see if my levels have gone up. If they double, that's good news. If they go down, I do not have a viable pregnancy. I meet with the OU doctor who is the first to say out loud "You are pregnant" and tells me my "period" from the week before could have been implantation or the body trying to have a miscarriage (there's that word again). So she orders a blood test to check my HCG levels. However, this is a test that has to be sent out so she won't know the results very quickly. Lovely. I get stuck for a third time, but luckily they used my right arm instead this time. I was asked to come back Thursday afternoon for a follow up appointment. Phil and I remember as we're walking out of the health center that the Michael Buble concert is in Tulsa that night. He got floor seats as my Valentine's Day gift. Well, I really wanted to go and I've never had floor seats before. We decide to go and we have a blast. I even get to touch his hand!!! I told my mom that I no longer have a left and right hand, but instead have a left and Buble hand ;) I slept a good part of the way home that night.

Wednesday

I go to class as per usual, still worried about my blood test. Well, none of my stuff was ready to go so I ask permission to go take my blood test and come back. The professor agrees and Phil takes me to get my left arm stuck again, (we're up to four times now). I go back to class, then to work. The whole time I'm just sick to my stomach and scared. I finally get a call around 3pm saying my hCG had doubled! I didn't get an exact number, but that would put me in the 60's at least. It's still low, but it is going in the right direction. I'm assuming Dr. Vaughan isn't too concerned because my next test to check my levels is not until next week. I start my twice daily progesterone medicine. I go back to school after work to finish my project and get home pretty late.

Thursday

I don't have class for very long because it's the last day. I go to work a little early and feel pretty calm about everything. I go to my follow up appointment at OU and end up getting another hCG test (we now have a total of 5 in 4 days. Awesome). I won't know those levels until Monday at the earliest. I had a talk with the doctor there who decides to do an actual pelvic exam while I'm there. She didn't take a sample of anything, but she wanted to see how things looked. She told me she saw a little bit of brown spotting, but nothing she's overly concerned about. Also, my cervix is closed which is apparently another good sign. The doctor did a few other things, such as press on my lower abs and listened to my lungs to see how I was overall. She did inform me that, if I had any abdominal pain or bleeding to go to the ER. Ugh. I understand why she's telling me this, but I wish the word "miscarriage" would stop coming up. So anyways, overall she seemed positive which made me feel good again :)

I'm taking prenatal vitamins as well right now. I get nauseous every so often, but never for a while. I'm really sleep and my bathroom breaks have become more frequent. Other than that, I don't really have any symptoms. That makes me a little worried, but I keep forgetting just how early it is. The baby would be about 3 or 4 weeks putting me at about 5 weeks pregnant. I think as long as I remain calm, everything should be fine.

If you wouldn't mind continuing to send prayers and good thoughts my way, I'd be very happy :) Once I hear Baby C's heart beat, I think I'll be much better. That's also when I'll make it facebook official ;)

Hope y'all have had a good week with less needle experience than me!

Peace to you,

"Our God" by Chris Tomlin (listening to this daily :D)